Life can be so confusing.
Those who are living happy lives invariably have … clarity.
They’re clear on what life is generally all about. And they’re also clear how they fit in. They’re not perfectionists — getting 80% is pretty good for most assessments. But they have a good idea.
OK — that’s them — we all know there are people happy with their lot in life. But that may not be you. You may well want to be happy. Or more happy than we are now. I suspect most people would love to score their life 8/10.
Or perhaps even that is optimistic if you’re someone who, when asked to score the quality of your life on a scale from 1-10, might say…. “ -1”.
But even if that is how you feel, you’re not stupid. And if you are determined to feel better about life you know only too well that you are not going to change from -1 to 8/10 overnight. But you do know one thing. You’re not happy with your current score!
So how can things improve? It’s not as though you haven’t tried. You know you tried so many times to get fit, lose weight, manage personal finances better, find a loving relationship — and everything just fell apart.
Which, if you think about it, is good — because if you are honest you may not know how to get a great life — but you do know what didn’t work before! So why not use that as a marker?
You know you want change. And if change is to bring about a better quality of life, it has to be a change that lasts. Everyone who wants to lose weight can lose weight. Keeping it off is the key. Anyone who wants to be more secure financially can save some money. But can they do that consistently? So how to get consistent changes for the better?
One of the best ways to start to bring about a change for the better is to start by asking a question.
If you’re not happy with your life, why is that? If you lost something or someone, what do you take from that? If you’re overwhelmed, what can you do to get clarity? If you are fearful, how can you stop the fear paralysing you? Once you start asking questions, you start to get answers.
But here’s the thing. If the question is not a great question, the answer won’t be good. For example…
“Why can’t I lose weight??” might elicit the answer, “Because you’re a slob who eats junk food”
It’s not a great answer, but it’s an ANSWER. It’s a starting point.
You want to improve the quality of your life. Well, why not begin by trying to craft a better quality question.
Instead of “Why am I always so overweight?” why not ask “how could I lose weight AND enjoy the process??”
Ask a better question, and what happens? You get a better answer!
And, with a better answer, that shows you a path you could follow.
Questions produce clarity.
So ask a question. But if you don’t like the answer, aim for a better question.
Of course, it takes practice.
But so does the quality of life
What’s a better question you could ask….?